


I Never Do This

by darling_pet



Category: Ed (US TV)
Genre: F/M, First Dates, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, One Shot, Perfect Man is Perfect, Reader-Insert, Sexual Content, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-29
Updated: 2017-06-29
Packaged: 2018-11-21 05:30:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11350860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darling_pet/pseuds/darling_pet
Summary: You just had the best date of your life with your charming new neighbour, Ed Stevens. He's everything you could ever ask for in a man. Does the date really have to end here on his doorstep?





	I Never Do This

**Author's Note:**

> 13 years too late, much? I ended up writing this story after it came to me in a recent daydream, just wrote it out for fun/personal satisfaction. But now I feel the need to post it. (So relieved I downloaded all the episodes last year before YouTube took 3/4 of the series down.)

You can't believe this date is over.

It was by far the best date you have ever been on and this was just the first one! Ed Stevens is the most gentlemanly, ridiculous, charming, and devastatingly handsome man that has crossed your path. Where has he been hiding all your life? You both round the street corner and he gestures to his house, porch lights illuminated in the dark night.

“This is me,” Ed says. But you already knew that seeing as he's your neighbour. “You know, you didn't have to walk me home. In fact, I think it's actually _my_ job to walk _you_ home!” You giggle and link your arm into his.

“Oh please! I wanted to break the social norms!” Ed leads you up his front steps and turns toward you with the most adorable little smile and a twinkle in his outrageously blue eyes.

“I had such a great time with you, Ed,” you tell him, feeling your face flush.

“I did, too. I'm glad you said yes! Not many women would agree to go on a date with a sweaty, out of breath stranger in baggy clothes.” He's referring to the fateful day he asked you out. Ed had been playing basketball in his driveway with his best friend Mike and they were really going hard that day. Secretly, you would watch them whenever they would play, admiring your new neighbour's skills and physique. But there's no way in hell you'd admit that to him!

“Well, you've been such a kind neighbour to me and I found you cute, so how could I possibly have said no?”

“ _Found_ me cute? As in past tense?”

“Yes, past tense. You know why?”

“Why?”

“Because now I find you _beyond_ cute.” Ed casts his gaze downward and laughs. Now he's the one blushing! He looks back to you, but there's something different in his eyes. He moves a little closer to you. With a gentle, warm hand against your cheek, he kisses your lips in the way you've hoped he would all night (and truthfully, since first meeting him). You return the kiss, adding a little more heat and he responds well to it, then stops.

“Do you... want to come in? For a drink or something?”

The thought races in your head. You so badly want to join Ed inside, but this is the first date! If you go in 'for a drink' (which you are fully aware is code), you just _know_ one thing will lead to another, and you are not one to sleep with a guy on the first date. It's a rule you've made for yourself, have stuck to, and have planned to continue doing. No matter how perfect the date was...

“That sounds really nice but I think I should be heading home.” Ed tries to show that he's the totally cool, understanding, stand-up guy, but you can sense the disappointment. It's because you're feeling the same way. You give him another kiss and run your hands down his arms. Ed's hand finds yours and holds it, even up until the point of you walking away.

You get to the bottom step of his porch before heading back up to him while saying, “Ah, fuck it.” He turns at your curse as you throw your arms around his neck and plant a much deeper, more desperate kiss on his so soft lips. It's like his body also senses your urgency of need and fumbles his hand with opening his front door.

“Come on, door!” Ed mutters in between your kisses. “Of all the days to stick.” He gets it open and when you both step inside, jackets are being thrown into the air haphazardly. Next thing you know, you're letting out a squeal as Ed scoops you up in his arms, now carrying you up the stairs to his bedroom. _Oh God, this is really happening._

It's all a blur – layers being shed in a blink of an eye. As the clothes don't stop flying off your bodies, you have to say, “I _never_ do this on a first date. I just don't.”

“Neither do I,” he confesses, already sounding a little out of breath. And funnily enough, even this having been your first date, you can tell this to be true. As you strip down to your underwear, Ed hastily removes his undershirt and tosses it, revealing his perfectly toned stomach. _Jesus, how can someone go from beyond cute to crazy hot in a matter of seconds?_

Leave it to Ed Stevens.

You gasp at the sight of his bare skin and muscular arms, throw the back of your hand to your forehead, and pretend to faint, falling backwards onto his bed. Although not seeing it, you hear the jingling sound of his belt unbuckling. In this moment, it's like music to your ears.

“Too much for you?” Ed teases while moving closer to hover over you.

“You have no idea,” you breathe out. He presses himself down against you.

“Just you wait.”

Sliding yourself back to the head of the bed, Ed crawls after you and _goddamn_ if that isn't the hottest thing you've seen yet. He stares at you with lust-filled eyes before his lips meet yours, igniting a spark throughout your entire being. Ed's slender fingers move down the side of your body until...

They slip their way past your underwear (the good ones, thank heavens) and stroke you slowly. You need more than that, and as if he can read you already, he delves his digits into you, learning what makes you tick in just the right way.

Whatever he's doing, he's _definitely_ doing it right. Ed's fingers tactfully discover the perfect combination of places to hit, making you writhe under his touch. But it's his mouth trailing kisses across your chest is what really starts to send you over the edge. He slowly moves higher and you turn your head to the side so he can get easier access to the sweet spot on your neck. His still cotton-covered length presses hard against you.

“Ed, oh my God.”

At that, whether it be from the pleasure emitting from your voice, or from merely _feeling_ you down below, Ed takes it upon himself to frantically search his nightstand table for some protection. He does away with both your undergarments, prepares himself, and then-

With simultaneous gasps, the man of your dreams smashes all expectations of how he would feel inside you to dust. Each and every time he pumps his well-built rhythm into you is pure fireworks. Ed's noises are beautiful. _He's_ beautiful. He's leaving you breathless and panting and needing _more_ of him. You beg him to not stop, never stop, followed by strings of outcries of his name. Your insides begin to coil as he works you both through your shared ecstasy.

When you both come down from your highs, Ed topples next to you on his back and stares at the ceiling while breathing heavily. Transfixed, you watch his chest move up and down. Your eyes meet his and all that's shared between you two are smitten smiles and slowly drooping eyes. He wiggles to get up next to you to wrap his arms around your body.

Nothing more needs to be said.

 

*

 

The most wonderful smells are a delightful awakening to your morning. You turn on your side and notice Ed is no longer in the bed with you. It almost disappoints you, hoping he would be the first sight you'd see after waking, but then you see a little piece of paper on his pillow.

_Meet me downstairs when you wake up. :)_

You grin while slowly stretching your limbs. What are you going to wear downstairs? Surely not your date outfit. But how about...?

You follow the smell down to his kitchen. Ed, in sweatpants and a white undershirt, is hard at work, appearing to be cooking every single breakfast food on the face of the planet. He eventually spots you leaning against the wall, watching him while clothed in one of his very baggy T-shirts and basketball shorts.

“Wow,” he says. “You look...”

“Like a pro?” you offer.

“Like an extremely sexy pro.” Clearly he's enjoying seeing you in his clothes. You wander over to him and kiss him good morning, making sure to feel up his gorgeous bare arms – the ones that held you all night.

“I had such an amazing time with you last night. _You're_ amazing.”

“Well, Ed Stevens is known to be the world's greatest lover,” he jokes. _I'd say._

“Now tell me,” you say playfully smacking his arm. “What are you all cooking here, Chef?”

“Over here we have waffles with whip cream and berries, some bacon-”

“Oh Ed, if you didn't have my heart before, you certainly have it now with the bacon.” He gives you a peck on the lips.

“And how do you like your eggs, beautiful?”

“Scrambled.”

“Done.” The pair of you get a little distracted with your physical displays of affection and it takes the smoke alarm to break you two apart.

“Ahh!” he yells, rushing to attend to his millions of cooking dishes. “Pay no attention to the flailing man in the kitchen!”

This man is perfect.

**Author's Note:**

> My love for Ed Stevens knows no bounds


End file.
